What's really best for the kids?

Jacob and Sophia were ordered into counseling by a Family Court judge two years ago. They never got the counseling until they entered foster care.

But for various reasons, their first counselor dropped them. We would have simply found another counselor, but....in come the "helpers!"

DSS picked out a counselor who works an hour away from us. After several months, the bio mom signed paperwork for the kids to go there, and only then did DSS bother to ask that counselor whether he accepted Medicaid.

He doesn't.

So here we are, with two traumatized kids who desperately need counseling. Jacob has had a total of two counseling sessions in his life. Sophia has had a few more. Jacob's doctor has strongly recommended that he get counseling, as have two psychologists and his teachers. He's been having severe troubles that need addressing.

And it turns out the counselor DSS picked out will counsel him -- but not Sophia, due to tiny differences in their type of Medicaid.

So you'd think that we would whisk Jacob off to the DSS-selected counseling, right?

Nope.

DSS today wrote to tell me that they feel it's best for the two kids to see the same counselor. So on Friday they'll discuss it with bio mom and look at other options.

It's best that they see the same counselor? This is probably best in the same way that it was best for Jacob to not get an eye exam in April, when the school district wanted to determine whether his reading struggles were developmental (possibly dyslexia) or simply an eyesight problem. Bio mom didn't want him to get an eye exam, so he didn't get one. Because that's what's best for him. Uh huh.

Similarly, it was best for him to go to summer camp with no coping strategies for his trauma other than what we could dream up on our own or get from google. So now he's not allowed to go on field trips and is sometimes restricted from other activities too -- because his coping methods aren't effective. In school, he was getting in more and more trouble too, and missing out on recess, movies, etc. But get him to a counselor? Nah. Waiting is what's best for him.

Sometimes I wonder if they even remember they're talking about a small boy who is utterly lost and desperately in need of help.